ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED
Army–Navy watch parties · Sat Dec 12 · 3pm ET
The year is 2026. College football is now a pay-to-play professional league.
America has one hope left. Our rockbound highland home. Castle Grayskull. The Jewel of the Hudson. The Pride of Highland Falls. Army. USMA. West Point. (And, to a much lesser extent, our sister service academies.)
No NIL. No transfer portal. No Kalshi-fueled bullshit. Pure, unadulterated, red-blooded American sweat, blood, tears and pigskin.
Duty. Honor. Country.
The AOG still pays for Hivebrite, despite everyone's better judgment. Societies around the world make do with their own homegrown mix of Facebook, LinkedIn, websites and group texts to coordinate.
Fear not. BeatNavy.org is here.
No more wondering what watch parties are out there. No more wondering if anyone wants to come hang out on your couch.
Set up your own. Join another.
Is this AI slop? Perhaps. Vibe coded? Probably. Also very much a byproduct of the prestigious IT105 towel and a desperate angst to not fall into the permanent underclass post-AGI.
In any case: eat, drink, and beat Navy.
Beat Navy.
Beat Navy.
Beat Navy.